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Love Spells From Mistress Tiger Pussy: Insufferable Pisces

Love Spells From Mistress Tiger Pussy: Insufferable Pisces

Dear Mistress Tiger Pussy,

I'm a newly wed but I've been with my man for quite some time. It seems that things have gotten harder since getting married; his patience with me has been a lot lower than it used to be. I've been less patient, too. We argue a lot. I like to think we're just getting used to our new boundaries as married people-- it's not always bad, and I love him so much it hurts. Sometimes, though, he just annoys the crap out of me. He likes to pick on me a lot, which I think is just how he shows he cares. He's an Aquarius, and I'm more of a sensitive Pisces. He grew up with a lot of younger brothers and sisters, but I'm an only child. I'm just not used to it. I've made offerings to Freyja to help improve things in my new marriage, and that has helped, but I was wondering if you had any advice or guidance to give?

Love,

Insufferable Pisces


Dear Insufferable Pisces,

Marriage is a powerful ritual that can definitely have a dramatic effect on a relationship. The vows you recited evoked a new entity that you now both have a hand in maintaining. Many married people report feeling a marked difference after the ceremony, even if they had been with their partner for years before. I suspect part of this is the power of the new names you each have: husband, wife. They have emotional, social, and legal power. It may feel as if you have each adopted a new identity, even though you know you’re the same people as before. It must be surreal!

None of this is news to you, I’m sure, and neither is what I’d advise you concentrate your efforts towards: communication! We all know it makes or breaks relationships, but it will especially come in handy in figuring out what underlies the irritability you’re both experiencing. I imagine a typical argument between an Aquarius man and a Pisces woman going:

“I feel like you’re just trying to annoy me.”

“I think you’re overreacting.”

He’s all think and you’re all feel, right? He wants to see your logic, you want to see his heart. Neither of you are going to change that in the other, and you wouldn’t want to or he wouldn’t be the man you’re in love with. So rather, try to meet him on his level. As Don Draper would say, “change the conversation” by inviting him into an intellectual discussion of your marriage.

You report a lack of patience. In other words, impatience. If it’s persisting in the way you talk to each other, there’s a common thread running underneath. What are you each impatient for? Maybe it’s to get over the subtle but very present adjustments you’re both undertaking in this process of becoming married. Talking openly about these in a casual, non-confrontational, intimate setting will remind you that you’re both experiencing these adjustments, and that the discomfort and anxiety is okay because you can help each other. Since your Aquarius is likely a cerebral type, he might be skeptical of an overtly magic ritual. So here’s a spell-that’s-not-a-spell that might fulfill you both:


MTP’s Spell-That’s-Not-A-Spell For Communication Between Newlyweds

Step 1: Set aside a time to make a special dinner together. I suggest a Friday night, as that is Venus’ day, and on a waxing moon. Best not to title this a “Let’s Talk About Our Marriage” dinner or you’ll both find excuses to get out of it.

Step 2: Buy the ingredients together. Flirt in the aisles. Make other shoppers (like me) vomit a little in their mouths. He teases you? Tell him you’re this close to shoving bags of frozen peas down his shirt. Talking about food is great foreplay for talking about what you each want and need to feel fulfilled. Be flexible—maybe try a dish he’s always wanted to make, or one that you had somewhere out that rocked both your worlds. Let him choose Cheetos as a side dish. Use phrases like, “Let’s try it!” or “Go for it!” Your Aquarius loves his freedom, so showing him you’re down to let him do him will inspire his gratitude and affection. Pick out a bangin’ dessert, maybe something chocolate or lavender for aphrodisiac effect. Buy some wine or some other special beverage you’ll both enjoy.

Step 3: Cook the meal. As you do, imagine that the ingredients you both chose and are now adding are all the positive qualities you’ve each brought into the marriage. When he adds his, think of one of his positive qualities you love. When you add yours, think of one of the qualities he loves about you. As the ingredients cook together, watch how each one combines to strengthen and compliment one another. Consider how each ingredient becomes part of a new, unified dish.

Step 4: Set the table with yellow candles, to open the channels of communication. Fill a vase with lavender sprigs for peace and love, holly or ivy for luck as newlyweds, or gardenia to increase love vibrations.

Step 5: Once you are both seated across from each other, pour the wine or other beverage into your glasses. Toast each other, making sure to maintain eye contact. As you drink, imagine that the liquid trickling down your throats is opening, empowering, and purifying both your vocal chords.

Step 6: Enjoy your meal, making frequent sustained eye contact. Yes, Insufferable Pisces, eye-fuck your husband like it’s the first time you’ve met. Compliment his choice in ingredients or how he cooked it. As you eat, think about all those warm and positive qualities of both of you being reabsorbed into your systems.

Step 7: The end of a meal is the perfect, relaxed moment to invite your husband into an open, worry-free conversation about what you had each expected marriage to be like. How have your expectations changed? What new things have you discovered? What are you excited or worried about? Listen without judging. Try to express your emotions in terms of cause-and-effect, as if you are a scientist poking at your own brain. If you can speak his language, he’ll be more likely to open up.

Step 8: Pinch out the candles, maybe grab some of those herbs and gnaw on ‘em like after dinner mints, take the wine on the road to the bedroom, and consummate the newly strengthened bond between you. Then finally, in the moment of climax, imagine that irritability shooting up and out of you like a big black ball, exploding into a million glittering pieces and showering down around your bodies like all the stars in the sky.

Many blessings on this challenging new journey!

MTP

Mistress Tiger Pussy is gladly accepting your questions about your relations with others of all genders and levels of intimacy. Email her at witchcraftmag@gmail.com with the subject line 'Love Spell, Your Name' for a personalized love spell. You may also include a pen name such as "Can't Get Off The Floor In Seattle" or "Open Heart Hubby" or whatever seems fitting, otherwise your response will not include your actual name.

Illustrations provided by Carabella Sands. 

 

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